I’m grateful for all the depression, all the traumas, all the pain, all the disordered eating and all the sadness; without it, I wouldn’t have learned to fight, fight to be happy, be determined, persevere, overcome my own negativity, my own darkness.

Without it, I wouldn’t have learned to love eating, to love food, to really learn how to enjoy nourishing my body and taking care of myself. I wouldn’t have learned to be healthy, eat healthily, live healthily. And I wouldn’t have wanted to.

Without it, I wouldn’t have learned to eventually love life, to live in the present, to stop regretting, to stop worrying.

I wouldn’t have learned to carry on despite countless failures in the past; let go of the times I felt like I had ruined myself;

I wouldn’t have learned to not only love others but just as importantly, love myself.

I’m grateful for all the things in my past that I once regretted to the ends of the earth, that I once blamed myself for, despised myself for, wanted to destroy myself for.

Without the desperation that came with being up to my waist in sorrow, self-damaging thinking, destruction… I would never have been moved to change.

Without all the hurt, anger, frustration, guilt, ridiculously self-disparaging thoughts, and myriad of other uncomfortable or terrible feelings… and without the constant obstacles of the present that I now see as growth opportunities… I wouldn’t have learned to be strong, and I wouldn’t have had a reason to even try.

I’m grateful for everything that has happened, is happening, and will happen. Even if it kind of sucked at the time, and might not be so cheery in the future.

What are you grateful for?

read more:

1. how to be grateful for an uncontrollable, stuff-yourself-until-you’re-sick binge…
2. the 6 secrets to bouncing back after a binge
3. the road of self-love is not paved for slackers.